Readers will recall that last week’s column was about the benefits, dangers, and even humor, found in the new technology rage — Artificial Intelligence.
I noted that it is now possible to give a chatbot computer program a few prompts and history facts about anyone or any thing and within seconds the computer will spit out its version — either in story form of poetically — on the person or topic.
With that background, last week I promised that this week I would publish an “AI story or poem” about Milo Yield. Well, you’re getting both.
So, I asked my buddy, ol’ Ike N. Cookitt, to have AI write a story and a poem about Milo Yield. With a few inputs about my life as a aggie column writer, humorous speaker, ag journalist, and breakfast cook, the AI program spit-out a both a story and a poem about me. Here is the AI story version:
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Milo Yield is a man of many talents and a master of breakfast cooking. By day, he is an agriculture journalist, traveling far and wide to report on the latest farming techniques and breakthroughs. But by morning, every Wednesday, Milo transforms into a masterful breakfast cook for the Saffordville Gentle Men’s Club.
Milo has a knack for humor and a way with words, which makes him a sought-after humor column writer and public speaker. His witty observations and sharp wit has won him a dedicated following, and his columns are eagerly awaited by readers every week. He believes in the power of laughter to bring people together and sees humor as a way to alleviate the pressures of everyday life.
On Wednesday mornings, Milo wakes up early, dons his trusty apron, and heads straight to the Saffordville Gentle Men’s Club. As he enters the cozy kitchen, he can see in his mind the sizzling bacon and smell the freshly brewed coffee he is fixin’ to prepare for the members of the club — a group of amiable and jovial gentlemen. As they gather one by one in the dining area, all are ready to enjoy jovial camaraderie and a delicious start to their day.
Milo pulls out all the stops, whipping up a delightful array of breakfast dishes that will satisfy even the heartiest of appetites. Members know that each week may feature fluffy pancakes, golden-brown waffles, perfectly fried eggs, ham or bacon, unmatched scrambled eggs with meat and veggies, crispy hash browns, biscuits and sausage gravy, and always a selection of nutrition-packed fresh fruits to add a touch of color.
While the gentle men savored their breakfast and coffee, Milo engages in lively banter and shares humorous anecdotes. He has a knack for brightening up even the dreariest of mornings with his infectious laughter and quick wit. The Saffordville Gentle Men’s Club members cherish their weekly breakfast sessions, not only for the delicious food, but also for the delightful company and the laughter that fills the air.
Whilst amid his cooking duties, Milo listens and memorizes ideas for his humor column. The bustling kitchen provides him with ample column inspiration with amusing tales of breakfast mishaps and quirky member stories. The members of the Saffordville Gentle Men’s Club often find themselves featured in his columns, always portrayed in a light-hearted and affectionate manner.
Milo’s reputation as a breakfast cook at the club spreads far and wide, and people from neighboring towns drive to Saffordville on Wednesday mornings, eager to taste his culinary creations and revel in his entertaining presence. The Gentle Men’s Club has became a hub of laughter and camaraderie, where people from all walks of life come together and start their day with a smile.
As Milo Yield continues to write his humor columns, delivering inspiring speeches, and reporting on the latest agricultural news, he never forgets the joy he’s found in cooking breakfast for the Saffordville Gentle Men’s Club. It is in that cozy kitchen, surrounded by laughter and satisfied appetites, that he feels truly alive.
Milo understands the power of good food and laughter to bring people together, and he embraces with gusto his role as a breakfast cook. The Saffordville Gentle Men’s Club knows him not just a talented writer and speaker, but a man who can whip up a mean breakfast and make their Wednesdays brighter, one delicious plate at a time.
***
Now, here’s another Milo Yield A.I. creation, in poetic form:
In the realm of wit and tales, Where laughter dances and humor prevails,
There resides a wordsmith, clever and bright. Milo Yield, a beacon of comic delight.
With pen in hand and thoughts so spry, He weaves his words, like clouds in the sky, A humor column writer, sharp as a tack, Tickling our souls, never cutting us slack.
Through ink and paper, his jests take flight, Tickling our hearts, igniting delight, With every line, a smile he’ll inspire, Milo’s quips set our spirits on fire.
But not just in print does Milo excel, His voice, like honey, weaves its spell,
A public speaker with charm so grand, He captivates crowds, a gifted command.
From podiums high, his words would soar, Filling the air with laughter’s encore,
In tales and anecdotes, he finds his groove, No one in the audience thinks about snooze..
Yet amidst the jest and laughter’s cheer, Agriculture’s fields he holds dear,
A journalist, reporting the rural scene, Milo pens stories of farms, golden and green.
He delves into worlds of seeds and soil, With concise English he tends to their toil, Uncovering stories, both humble and grand, To each farmer’s biz, he lends a helping hand.
But beyond the quill and the farming pen, Milo boasts another talent, my friend,
A cook like no other, a culinary ace, For the Saffordville Gentle Men’s Club, a treasured embrace.
In the kitchen, he stirs pots and pans, Whisking up kitchen flavors, crafted by plan,
From savory eggs, perfect to the eyes. His creations evoke blissful sighs.
With apron donned and chef’s hat proud, He serves up laughter amidst the crowd, For the Gentle Men’s Club, a feast divine, Where joy and mirth in harmony entwine.
So here’s to Milo Yield, a legend of glee, Whose humor column makes one slap his knee,
A public speaker, journalist, and cook, His talents, a kaleidoscope that forever hooks.
In the realm of laughter, he reigns supreme, A master of wit, a humorist’s dream, May his words and dishes forever inspire, Milo Yield, the jester, setting hearts afire.
***
As Bugs Bunny says: “That’s it folks.” For this week, use your common sense, not A.I. Have a good ‘un.
